Listen to this obituary
“If you think you are beaten, you are
If you think you dare not, you don’t,
If you like to win, but you think you can’t
It is almost certain you won’t.
If you think you’ll lose, you’re lost
For out of the world we find,
Success begins with a fellow’s will
It’s all in the state of mind.
If you think you are outclassed, you are
You’ve got to think high to rise,
You’ve got to be sure of yourself before
You can ever win a prize.
Life’s battles don’t always go
To the stronger or faster man,
But soon or late the man who wins
Is the man WHO THINKS HE CAN!”
All of us have just gotten through or are in or about to be in a crisis! That is the nature of life. If you want to reside in a community where no one has any problems, move into a cemetery. 100% of a doctor’s patients eventually die.
But, what about those of us left behind? One of the secrets to surviving grief — and even thriving – is to DECIDE AHEAD OF TIME that you will survive and thrive! Make a list of resources, and when grief comes, remember that you have already committed to work your plan. If you are married, make your spouse an equal partner. Set yourself up to succeed.
There is a term that applies to all this that may be new to you: Anticipatory Guidance. Here is a link to a full discussion of the subject: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1112778/
“Members of health care teams can often prepare people for the losses that are to come. People need time to achieve a balance between avoidance and confrontation with painful realities, and we need to take this into account when we impart information that is likely to prove traumatic. One way is to divide the information that needs to be confronted into “bite sized chunks.” Doctors do this when we break bad news a little at a time, telling a patient as much as we think he or she is able to take in. Patients seldom ask questions unless they are ready for the answers, and they will usually ask precisely what they want to know and no more. It follows that we should invite questions and listen carefully to what is asked rather than assuming that we know what the patient is ready to know. By monitoring the input of information, a person can control the speed with which they process that information.”
Ecclesiastes 9:9-10 (ETRV)
9 Enjoy every day of your short life. God has given you this short life on earth-and it is all you have. So enjoy the work you have to do in this life. 10 Every time you find work to do, do it the best you can. In the grave there is no work. There is no thinking, no knowledge, and there is no wisdom. And we are all going to the place of death.